Why Prayer Matters
In a very dark season of life, I wrote a life mission statement in the front of my journal:
Life Goal: Strive to be a joyful woman of prayer who is generous with my resources.
Joyful, because being joyful instead of depressed and anxious sounded like a dream come true.
Generous, because I didn’t like the survival-mode, tunnel-vision, self-centeredness I was operating in.
And prayer, because… well, because I guess as Christians we’re “supposed” to pray.
It seemed like an impossible goal, mostly because it was the polar opposite of what I was. I was bitter and angry, I didn’t “get” prayer so I didn’t really pray (aside from telling God how mad I was which does count but shouldn’t be where we stop), and so much loss and trauma made me hold onto my resources, especially internal ones like energy and time, for dear life.
But I knew people in real life who had been through more than me and had less than me, and they were joyful and generous… how did they do it?
Let’s back up a moment and ask the question of how did I get to a point of even considering what I was or wasn’t, and how other people had what I didn’t have. The answer? I came to the end of myself.
I’ve always been a “do it myself” kind of girl. Apparently I was barely past two years old when the independent streak showed up. “Riah, riah, MOriah do it!” was something my mom heard often when she tried to help me (sorry mom!).
It took almost eight years of intense and direct physical suffering to crack me and bring me to a point where, having muscled through and tried everything I could think of to change my situation, I had to admit that I was hopelessly and helplessly stuck.
It turns out, the key was the part I thought was least important: prayer.
In his book, A Praying Life, Paul E. Miller describes a common issue we face with prayer:
“One of the subtlest hindrances to prayer is probably the most pervasive. In the broader culture and in our churches, we prize intellect, competency, and wealth. Because we can do life without God, praying seems nice but unnecessary. Money can do what prayer does, and it is quicker and less time-consuming. Our trust in ourselves and in our talents makes us structurally independent of God. As a result, exhortations to pray don’t stick.”
“If you are not praying, then you are quietly confident that time, money, and talent are all you need in life. You'll always be a little too tired, a little too busy. But, if like Jesus you realize you can't do life on your own, then no matter how busy, no matter how tired you are, you will find the time to pray.”
How often do we wake up and start doing the things, because if we don’t make it happen it’s not going to happen? Somewhere along the way, I picked up the lie that that me, myself and I was the only person I could depend on, and that I could do it faster and better than God. It wasn’t until I ran completely out of myself that I started to see how much I needed God, and that prayer is my lifeline.
Paul writes,
“We have an allergic reaction to dependency, but this is the state of the heart most necessary for a praying life. A need heart is a praying heart. Dependency is the heartbeat of prayer.”
“The criteria for coming to Jesus is weariness. Come overwhelmed with life. Come with your wandering mind. Come messy.”
I don’t know about you, but if I’m honest with myself, I’ve been overwhelmed and weary for about as long as I can remember. Some days I’m more on top of things and feel more capable, other days I’m drowning before I get out of bed. Why did it take me so long to believe Jesus when He said “come weary”, instead of trying to power myself through?
Life isn’t a choose your own adventure book that we can read multiple times and try on different endings for size before we commit to one, so we’ll never know what would have happened if we had made a change sooner. But, we can always choose to stop and reorient ourselves to being Christ-centered and Christ-dependent, because we know that that direction will always and only produce the best outcome.
“According to Jesus, acknowledging our neediness opens the door to genuine and lasting happiness. Religions usually talk about what a person has to "do", but Jesus talks about what we "can't do". He says that our weakness, not our power or what we bring to God, enables us to know God.” (Paul E. Miller)
The key to being joyful and generous isn’t to make a list of things I need to do to make myself be a certain way. The key is acknowledging that I can’t do it myself, and prioritizing time with the One my help comes from.
Resources that have helped me develop habits of spending time with God in prayer:
A Praying Life by Paul E Miller
Pray Confidently and Consistently by Valerie Woerner
30 Minute Prayer Method free download
Prayer Focus Map from VMP
Some kind of journal or card system to track and record what you pray for and how God answers you.
Clockwise from top left:
The rare sighting of a completely clean kitchen table.
The window bench corner (my porch substitute- someday we’ll have a LEGIT porch) in our room, complete with artwork from the lovely Sarah Uhlman.
After waiting 7 months to come back from the butcher (usually it’s 3, thanks ‘Rona for the gift that keeps on giving), the beef quarter was 50% larger than usual. I have dubbed her “Frankencow”.
I converted to a larger gardening solution- whether or not that means more gardening results, however, remains to be seen.
Excessive snacks and water packed for a 5 hour round-trip to a big doctor’s appointment- more on that soon probably.
The ocean. A staple for life. Necessary for health and happiness. Already been in the water this year. Can’t live without it.
I’m listening to…
Audiobooks:
→ Anne of Avonlea
Podcasts:
→ This episode on Shame
→ Basecamp: Into the Dark (on my next up list to try out so I can’t vouch, but it has some great guests on the list)
Music:
→ Christ Our Hope in Life and Death - Keith and Kristyn Getty
→ Hope - NF
I’m reading…
→ God’s Healing for Life’s Losses by Robert Kellemen
→ Dark Clouds Deep Mercy by Mark Vroegop
→ Minding Frankie by Maeve Binchy (fiction)
I’m loving…
→ Memory Verse Lock Screens - we pick up our phones a million times a day, why not capitalize on that habit? These lock screens use the first letter of each word of the verse to prompt me when I’m learning a new verse.
I’m cooking…
→ Sheet Pan Fajitas
Serves 8
Mix together and let the chicken marinate for 30 min to all day:
2 T olive oil
1 t cumin
1 t chili powder
1/2 t paprika
1/2 t garlic powder
1/2 t onion powder
1/2 t oregano
1 t salt
1.5-2 lbs chicken breast, cut into strips
Slice thinly and drizzle with olive oil:
2-3 bell peppers, different colors (green isn’t as good)
1 red or vidalia onion
1-2 jalapeños
Arrange chicken strips and veggies on a baking sheet and bake at 425’f for about 20-30 minutes or until chicken is cooked through and veggies are just turning soft.
Serve with tortillas and your favorite toppings. Ours are:
Cheese
Sour cream (or greek yogurt)
Cilantro
Green onions